What I Want To Be Now That I Am All Grown Up.

As a child, I had a very over-active imagination.

As a result, I had some pretty outlandish plans for what I was going to achieve when I grew up and became an adult.

img_0146.jpgI have officially been an adult for several years now and I am yet to achieve any of the goals that I set out for myself when I was five.

I haven’t written a novel (unless you count the Warrior Cats fan-fiction that I wrote when I was 13…) and I know from previous experience that I can’t be trusted to keep a house plant alive for an extended period of time, let alone five ponies.

I’m not famous and the closest I’ve come to going to space was the time I went to see Gravity at the cinema and paid £5 extra for an ‘immersive’ IMAX experience, which basically meant that my seat vibrated a little bit whenever Sandra Bullock was in the middle of an action sequence or an explosion.

What five-year old me didn’t realise  is that being an adult (aka. someone who is self-sufficient, responsible, financially and emotionally stable and just generally has their life more or less under control) can be a hard enough task in itself.

Nowadays, the goals that I set for myself tend to be slightly less outlandish.

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That being said, I do still want to write a novel set in space and that will make me very famous and give me the money to purchase an entire herd of ponies…

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I Think I Might Be Scared Of My Comfort Zone.

I have a love-hate relationship with my comfort zone.

On one hand, I like my comfort zone because it makes me feel as if I am in control.

When I am inside my comfort zone, I feel confident, stable and grounded.

On the other hand, if I stay inside my comfort zone for an extended period of time, I start to feel guilty.

I get anxious that I’m not progressing or developing in any way, that I’m letting myself down and that my life isn’t going anywhere.

At this point, I start to resent my comfort zone.

I worry that my tendency to stay within my comfort zone is causing me to miss out on important life experiences and preventing me from fulfilling my potential.

My comfort zone transforms into my FOMO zone.

Eventually, the anxiety of staying inside my comfort zone becomes so huge that it overwhelms my fear of straying outside of it.

At this point, I make a concerted effort seek out activities that scare me in an attempt to push myself outside of my comfort zone.

I like to imagine that I’m an astronaut taking one small step into the unknown depths of space when, in reality, I’m probably just taking a phone call from an unknown caller ID.

astronaut_LI (3)astronaut_LI (3)If you enjoyed this post, feel free to check out some of my other posts. For more blog posts and drawings, you can also follow me on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.